Am I obligated to send my dad a Fathers Day card?

My father and I had a falling out in January. I don't speak to him anymore because of him lying to me and saying things about me to my younger brother, who now says the same things. I've made the same mistakes my Dad did at the same age. But I'm stupid and a loser, but his mistakes are forgivible because it was a long time ago. My birthday was in May, he sent no card, email, or called. I'm 7 months pregnant, he hasn't once asked how I'm doing. I doubt he even knows when I'm due or that I'm having a girl. He didn't acknowledge Mothers Day. (I'm not a Mom YET, but alot of other people said something to me.) My Mom says she could careless wether I ever talk to my Dad again, even though we used to be very close. She says if her Dad ever did the things my Dad did to me, she'd never talk to him either. But my boyfriend says, I should still send a card, because he's still my Dad. He's not close with his Dad, but still calls and sends cards. What should I do? Am I obligated?

Am I obligated to send my dad a Fathers Day card?
i wouldnt send him one...doesnt sound like he's been much of a father 2u. maybe if you dont send him one he'll notice and wonder why and maybe actually examine himself?I agree with your mom. Just bc he's biologically your dad doesnt mean anything---it's the relationship that matters. People put too much emphasis on blood.
Reply:I don't think you should feel obligated to do anything you aren't comfortable with. If you don't want to talk to your father, don't.
Reply:No, your never obligated to send your parents cards for parents day or any holiday for that matter, it's entirely up to you and how you feel on the topic.
Reply:...no more then "he" is "obligated" in sending you a birthday card (gift) or a Christmas card (gift)... family is precious, forgiveness is precious and reconciliation is the door to peace.........choose wisely.
Reply:i think you should send a card because if something happens to him you going regeat it. by sending the card it going show him that you still love him even though you guys not talking. good luck
Reply:You are obligated to send him a Father Day card.
Reply:if u continue this cold war with ur father, nothing is going to work out well. u will contine to be miserable. u r a mother, the resident peace maker of a family. u should know that the key is in understanding relationships and knowing when to give in and when not to. ur father might have some ego problem, in accepting his fault. wont u like to have a good time with ur father? wouldnt u lke him to a good granpa to ur child? there is nothing wrong in sending him a card. u will never lose by sending hima card. u will only rise in others eyes when u send him a card. if possible, send him a letetr or have a chat with him. tell him how his actions have hurt u and how bad u felt when he isregarded his won grandchild. tell him that u would do everything in power to resume a normal relation with ur parents as it would make everybody happy.(i am sure you do)
Reply:hello, well im so sorry to hear that youre not getting along with youre father anymore. But when you give birth to youre beautiful baby girl do you want him to be a part of her life?

I personally think that he shuld be, and i think you should try and make a mends or just have some contact with him, beacuse aftr all youre little girl would love to have a grandfather, i think you should send him a card and if he replys ask him if he wants to go out for dinner, but if youre still hurt or feel uncomfortable i full support you not to, anyway good luck with youre baby i wish you all the best.

:)
Reply:well im saying this cause this is how i view your situation after reading this....its obvious you care or you wouldn't be on here asking this question. i think that your bf is right...regardless of what happen in the past he is still your father...be the better person. sometimes its harder to do so but in the end its the best thing...not sending him a card is bringing you down to his level..you said you once had a close relationship with your father...that little girl inside you must want that back...you make the first move at it...if he ask other people to ask you how your doing that must tell you something..but its the tough man in him that wont let him break down...send him a card but dont expect anything back....when you expect something it could bit you in the ***...just do it and hope for the best..another way to say dad i want you in my life..i want you to know your granddaughter is to include a ultrasound photo in his card. you should go through life holding a grudge if you do that you can't say your life is completely happy...

i know he hurt you..(from what i read)...answer this question for me..if you father were to die tomorrow would you cry? if so wouldn't you regret not communicating with him someway before he had passed..its hard to think of life that way but you dont have forever...people we care about could be gone in the next min...

remember all the great times you shared with your father that the bad...hope everything works out for you take care

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